O. Orgasm

“Susie what rhymes with orgasm?”

“What?”

“What rhymes with orgasm?  I’m writing a poem.”

Susie snorted, “A poem on orgasms?  Are you serious?  Ha ha, it would be easier to describe one I reckon.”

“Yeah, but I’d have to think hard about who has given me a good one to write about it!”

“Ha ha.  I know what you mean.  But you’d have lots of experiences to draw on wouldn’t you?”

“Oh!  Piss off!  I haven’t slept with that many men!”

“Sure, sure Sharon.  Okay then, who was your worst lay?”

“Ummm, I reckon it would have to be at Uni with a guy who kept egging himself on.  He was like, “Go Russ, go Russ”!”

“Really?  How did you not laugh?”

“Luckily for me I could bury my face in the pillow – he liked it that way too!  Who was your worst?”

“Easy – my first time and first boyfriend in high school.  It was over before I could catch my breath.”

“Ouch.  That was unlucky.”

“Yeah, but soon after that everyone started calling him Quickdraw so I didn’t feel too bad about it!”

“Susie you bitch!”  Both girls squealed with laughter.

“Right Sharon, who was your oldest one?”

“The Dean at University.”

“NO!”

“Yep.  I was drunk, but still it was pretty bad.  He was wrinkly and gray and he cried when he came.”

“Oh, Sharon I feel a bit sick hearing that.”

“Don’t worry.  I was sick.  Right in his briefcase on the way out.”

The girls continued to talk about their conquests, giggling and poking fun at each other the whole time.

“You must have had some good ones?” Susie asked.

“There was John for a few years, he was good.  And Alex after that, and a few one night stands.”

“What about Luke?  You seemed to be taken with him?”

“Luke was great!  The best sex I’ve ever had.  But boy, he was dumb.  When I told him I came from the northern beaches he asked me “where’s that?” and it got worse.”

“But there must have been someone that you thought you’d like to spend more time with?  Make it more permanent?”

“No” said Sharon.  “So far no-one’s brain has matched their performance.”

Susie sighed in pleasure, “I guess that’s where I got lucky.  John is a great guy and great in bed.”

“Oh come off it Susie.  He’s not that good in bed.”

“Yes, he is!  He’s bloody wonder–.  Sharon, what do you mean he’s not that good in bed?”

“What?”  Sharon looked at Susie, her smile turning to horror as she realised what she had said.  “Oh fuck.”

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2 Comments on “O. Orgasm”

  1. mish says:

    One word ~ BUSTED !! LOL !!
    Great dialogue …

    I’m popping in from the A~Z Challenge ! Nice to meet you . Enjoy the rest of the challenge & swing by my blog when you get a chance !

    ~MICHELLE~
    http://writer-in-transit.co.za/category/other/rambles-rants-and-raves/

    • ExpatGab says:

      Thanks for stopping by Mish. I love this A-Z Challenge – it’s fun to write for (having only just started) and I’m getting to meet some great people. I like your Chrysalis story. Mind if I ask how you keep up with your blog and your short story writing? I’ve only just started writing, but I’m having trouble keeping up with both. My short story has definitely suffered since starting this blog.


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